I spent my early 20s being the “cool girl.” I used to stay quiet, stay easy, and stay agreeable. I never wanted to look dramatic, so I brushed off things that hurt and pretended I was fine. I thought being low-maintenance would make me more desirable. Instead, it left me drained, frustrated, and choosing men … Read more
He said all the right things. Texted consistently. Made plans. Acted genuinely invested. Three months in, the question came: where is this going. The answer was the opposite of his behavior. Not ready for anything serious. The actions pointed one way. The words pointed another. That’s when I learned: don’t listen to what he does. … Read more
I was 23 when I made the worst dating decision of my life. He was charming. Funny. Said all the right things about faith. Went to church with me. But something was off. Small things. The way he talked about his ex. How he handled anger. His relationship with God felt more like performance than … Read more
I was doing everything right. Or so I thought. I’d cook his favorite meals. Keep the apartment clean. Handle errands without being asked. Pour effort into making his life easier. And he’d thank me, sure. But something felt off. Like I was giving everything I had and it wasn’t quite landing. Then one day, frustrated, … Read more
We were three months in when something felt off.I knew his favorite color, his go-to order, his shows, his routine.The deeper side remained unknown, including fears, influences, and life goals. We spent plenty of time together but stayed on the surface. Comfortable, safe, shallow. One night I finally asked, “What’s your biggest fear about relationships?”That … Read more
We were six months into dating when we had the conversation. “We need to set some boundaries,” I said. He looked confused. “But we’re doing fine. Why do we need rules?” Here’s what I’d learned the hard way from past relationships: “fine” isn’t good enough when you’re building something meant to last. Boundaries are not … Read more
There was a constant sense of instability. One day he was warm and attentive, the next brought tension and careful steps. Bringing up something hurtful often ended with an apology given instead of received. Anxiety grew, confusion surfaced, and trust in personal perception slowly faded. Friends said he seemed great, and doubts arose, maybe sensitivity … Read more
Last week my boyfriend and I ended up arguing over something minor and honestly I can’t even remember what sparked it. But I remember what I said. The exact words. The tone. The look on his face when I said it. I was focused on being right and ended up hurting him instead. What people … Read more
Dating after a toxic relationship is terrifying. You know that, right? Because part of you wants to try again. To find healthy love. To prove to yourself that not everyone is like your ex. But another part of you is scared. Hypervigilant. Convinced you’ll just repeat the same patterns or attract the same type of … Read more
Early dating is when people show you exactly who they are. The problem? Most of us aren’t paying attention. At the start, it’s easy to get caught up in excitement, butterflies, and hope. Red flags get overlooked, explained away as quirks or bad timing. The truth is, early dating is when people show their best … Read more